C is for Conversation – you’ll never finish one again unless you wait until the children are asleep and even then, you’ll be lucky.
C is for Co-Parent – like a Co-Pilot, usually just a presence that can back up any major decisions that you make. Or, if you’re the aforementioned ‘lucky’ they can take the reins from time to time.
C is for Corny – the jokes that you’ll have to laugh at even though you’ve heard them a thousand times since Abraham fell off his dinosaur.
C is for Clutter – unavoidable unless you have secret storage spaces in every room or black holes on open surface areas. Open Surface Areas – what’s that?
C is for Clamouring – for your love and attention, children all want all of you – not just a little piece – ALL
C is for Children – what babies become in a very short time, even though in the thick of things it might seem like forever.
C is for Criticism – from every available source on every available parenting subject. Fact is, ‘you’re doomed if you do and you’re doomed if you don’t.’
C is for Cup – the Sippy kind, pack all your pretty cut glasses away if you ever want to use them – at least until the Children are out of the house.
C is for Change – it’s inevitable and it won’t go at a pace that suits you. It will go at a pace that suits The Children
C is for Change – the big silver coins in your purse/wallet are not yours, they’re for tuck shop money now.
C is for Castor Oil – you only have to administer it once for the full effect if your child has a dramatic streak and likes to play in the Hypochondriac section of the imagination – after that you only need to lift the bottle with a big spoon – they’ll soon switch to Barbie/Cars.
C is for Creative – a better word to use to describe the little liars. Teachers will use this as a euphemism.
C is for Capitalist – a Child’s first politics.
C is for Crass – a Child’s first sense of humour.
C is for Chips – a Child’s staple diet – if you let them taste it once there’s no going back
C is for Cursing – you’re going to have to come up with some Creative Cursing unless you want to be spoken to by Teachers
C is for Culture – if you were one for classical music concerts and art galleries the closest you’ll get to it in the first 2 years of your Childs life will be in yoghurt.
C is for Clumsiness – your own due to sleep deprivation and the Childs due to still developing motor neural skills.
C is for Cupboard – this is not a good place to keep The Child but it is a good place to hide for The Parent.
C is for Cupboard Love – if you carry sweets and rustle the paper in your pockets the Clamouring stops until they’ve stopped chewing whatever you’ve handed them.
C is for Cuddling – if you’re lucky and your Children are not too busy, this is one of The Reasons for having the little things in the first place. Cuddling can be encouraged if you’re prepared to Read to them – Nothing in life is free.